April 23, 2019
It feels like the most important conversations are the hardest to have, doesn’t it? How many times have we known we should bring up a tough subject, only to chicken out when that toe-curling feeling of apprehension wiggles up in our gut? What if I told you there’s a simple trick to it? Not just […]
Read moreFebruary 28, 2019
Imagine the following situation: You’re on a narrow street waiting for the light to change behind a rusty car. The driver is focused on something in the back seat. When the light changes, she doesn’t notice. You tap your horn politely, but she ignores you. Then, she gets out of her car, opens the back […]
Read moreSeptember 13, 2018
We’ve talked a lot lately about the power of reciprocity. (Remember, reciprocity is the human tendency to reflect the attitudes and behaviors of others.) Today, we’ll give you a simple model for using reciprocity to defuse anger and hostility. But first, let’s do a quick recap. Reciprocity is so hardwired into our brains that when […]
Read moreJanuary 23, 2018
It’s no secret that there’s a lot of anger and hostility on the internet. Whether it’s the comments section of a not-even-slightly-provocative news piece, the chat room in your online game of choice, or your social media feed, it can sometimes feel like decency is the exception rather than the rule. Granted, there’s also plenty […]
Read moreAugust 31, 2017
Imagine for a moment that it’s time to hold someone accountable. This person can be a colleague, classmate, family member, friend, or anyone else. What adjectives would you use to describe your approach. Strong? Great! Persistent? For sure! Assertive? Absolutely! Now how about Warm? If you listed that last one, congratulations! Go to the head […]
Read moreFebruary 7, 2017
Pop quiz: How similar are these two situations? Situation 1 A twig snaps behind you. Whipping your head around, you see a mighty tiger barreling down on you at full speed. You and your hunting party stand your ground, spears poised to deliver a fatal blow. Situation 2 Your teenage daughter’s friends drop her off fifty […]
Read moreDecember 14, 2016
Last time, we discussed how powerful and pervasive the negativity bias can be. At its root is the pesky fact that the mind is much better at perceiving patterns in negative experiences than positive ones. Today, we’re going to talk about how, with a little mindfulness, we can beat the bias. We touched on this before, […]
Read moreNovember 7, 2016
So far in Brain Bytes, we’ve covered the basics of neuroplasticity, taking in the good, and the three brains: lizard, mammal, and primate. This week, we’re going to get to the very center of neuroplasticity: the negativity bias. The negativity bias refers to how easily the human brain turns negative experiences into neural patterns. In […]
Read moreOctober 11, 2016
OK, I’ll admit: that headline sounds completely bogus. But as it turns out, there’s science to back it up. And it has huge implications for how we handle frustrations at work and in our personal lives. If someone – a friend, a colleague, a family member – loses their cool and gets hostile towards us, […]
Read moreSeptember 1, 2016
If you had to guess, how much would you say workplace drama and conflict cost your department and organization? Remember to count lost productivity, strained working relationships, supervisor time, and even employee turnover. Of course, the amount will vary from business to business. But if your workplace is like the average organization, the cost is […]
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